How to Make Paper

The process of making paper dates all the way back to 105 A.D. from tree bark, rags and hemp. Today, paper is mainly machine made but yet some people still make paper by hand.

To make your own homemade paper you will need:

• Blender
• Rolling Pin
• Kitchen sink or a tub
• Towels or rags
• Paper Blotters
• Deckle (device used to limit the size of the sheet of paper)
• Nylon screen
• Sponge
• Leaves, glitter, or other decorations
• Paper- you can use old envelopes, papers, newspapers, (but avoid glossy paper)
• Microwave or hair dryer

 Step-by-Step Instructions:

1. Assemble your deckle by placing your larger frame over the smaller, screened frame.
2. Fill your sink or tub with warm water about three inches deep.
3. Tear your paper into 1" squares. Combine the water with your paper in the blender (it should be about two parts water to one part paper). Blend until the "pulp" is soft; it is okay to have small chunks.
4. Place your deckle into the sink about 1" into the water. Pour your pulp into the deckle and swish the deckle around.
5. Lift the deckle straight up and drain the water. 
6. Place the deckle on a flat surface. Remove the top half of the deckle.
7. Use your sponge to dab the pulp to absorb as much water as possible. Squeeze the sponge out and repeat. Flip the pulp and deckle over onto a towel and use the sponge to dab the screen like you did to the pulp before. 
8. Flip the screen and pulp onto blotter paper so that the pulp is sandwiched between the deckle screen and the blotter paper. Use a rolling pin to roll over the pulp sandwich. This is called "couching" (koo-ching). Keep couching until most of the water is absorbed.
9. Carefully lift one corner of the pulp sheet and let it dry. You can either let it air dry (1-3 days), heat it in the microwave (1-2 minutes), or use a blow dryer. If it curls, stick it under a heavy object over night.

To get creative you can add decorations or glitter or anything you can put in a blender.

Just a Reminder

Roses are red,
Some condoms are blue,
STDs are contagious,
So watch who you screw.

:)

Rare and Non-Existent Birds

The Flying Snark

The Flying Snark (volans snarkus) is a small-sized bird that is part of the genus roska of the paska family.They are most likely to be found in Michigan both in the upper peninsula and the lower. There are only about 50 birds left in the wild. The only known bird in captivity can be found at a high school in Manistee, Michigan in a Social Studies teacher's classroom. The Snark is capable of repeating many different sayings or noises that it hears.

Identifying a Flying Snark
The Flying Snark comes in a variety of colors from oranges, yellows, greens, blues, and purples.
To identify between a male and a female Snark you must be attentive to the following:
1. Male Snarks' have a deep rumbling-like chirp or squawk (kind of like a toad).
2. Female Snarks' are more verbal than males.
3. Male Snarks attract female Snarks by twitching their tails, much like giving people the finger for humans.


Snarks tend to be very territorial and are known to let off a numerous amount of different noises to ward off any trespassers. If you happen to come across a territory marked by the Flying Snark, they will likely stalk and harass you until you leave the premises.
As they are a rare species, hunting, killing, any physical contact whatsoever with a Flying Snark, is illegal and will not be tolerated. They are protected under the Federal Act of 1969, protecting all non-migratory birds of America.